Yesterday in Intelli-Q during my coaching class, my coach said that acceptance is very important. If you are unable to accept certain things that come your way, such as failure or criticism, you won't get very far in life. However, if you do, well, obviously you will go very far.
The thing is, I sat there and thought about this. I was thinking that maybe I wasn't that keen on acceptance and should start learning how to accept things better and perhaps that was what I keep getting angry and down about.
While that was going on in my mind, the coach assigned us groups and I was the oldest in the group that I was given. I didn't really mind coz there were only a few other 19 and 20 year olds there, but then this stupid girl looked at me with a weird face and asked "Are you in this group?" then I said "Yes, I think so. Coach said I was.".
She then called the coach over and pointed at me without saying anything wtf. So I spoke up la, you point at me and expect coach to read your fucking mind is it? Anyway, that wasn't what I said, I asked if I was in this group and he said yes. Then surprise, surprise, the girl finally spoke. She said "BUT SHE'S SO MUCH OLDER THAN THE REST OF US." Like wtf, do you think he doesn't know that? He said that so I can be the leader of the group and bla bla bla. She shut up and sat down. After that we were choosing leaders anyway and half of them pointed at me but I pointed to the guy next to me, and the same girl said "Let the eldest one be la." but I said "It's okay.".
The point is, I know that I am older than all of them and I accept that, no choice what wtf, but other people (the girl) do not accept it and doesn't know that I accept the fact that I am older. What I'm trying to say here is that the thing that gets on my nerves the most is not that I don't accept myself, is that people don't know that I accept myself and can't accept that I accept myself. Whoa inception of acceptance.
Honestly, I know that I'm not skinny and I do have more meat on my bones than the "typical" girl should, but I don't need you to tell me I'm fat. I know that. You really think I don't know that? Do you have to tell me to go bungee jumping to lose all my weight? This is why I don't talk to you.
I know that I hate my piano class and I'm not the best student there, but you don't have to fucking tell me that I'm hopeless and I'm the worst student. I am highly aware of what I do and how I do things. You don't need to repeat in words what my actions do just because you don't think that I know what I'm doing.
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| I am so angry fuuu. PS: I don't 9gag, am not a 9gag-er. I know memes through YouTube. |
So yeah, nice first blog of 2012. /pats self
Please check back every now and then for more updates and rants. Leave some comments in my new chatbox, don't spam.
Bai.
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